It’s a question I get asked a lot and it’s a fairly simple answer: Yes, many close family members know that I do porn, and they support me. And some of them don’t know yet because I want to come out to them when the time is right.

Simple enough on the surface, but there’s much more.

Without getting into too much specifics, because I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to speak on behalf of someone else with such a personal topic, I’ll share some of thoughts I’ve had since coming out a few years ago.

1. Coming out about porn can mean coming out about other things.
In my case, my porn involves a lot of aspects of my personal life. This means incorporating queer and kinky sex with many of my lovers, my gender expression, and this very website with my blog describing how I enjoy sex work and think it’s fun and healthy. That sentence alone incorporates at least five things to come out about, besides porn itself: My 1) queer sexuality; 2) Kink; 3) polyamorous lifestyle; 4) genderqueer/trans* identity; and, 5) sex work as sex-positive pleasure.

It can difficult to come out as just one of these things, so the fact that they’re wrapped up in one another adds complications. Since my teenage years, I’ve come out as gay, then poly, and the last three all together.

2. You don’t just come out once.
As I’ve come out over the years about different things, I’ve come to understand that the act of coming out is not a one-time event. It’s not like once you’ve come out, it’s over and things are either fine or they’re not. There are the on-going discussions that come up and there’s further outings that happen (either by you or other people, sometimes accidentally). It takes an open heart to commit to being honest about the fears and anger that can arise, and to communicate these feelings in a healthy way.

I’m blessed to have a lot of love in my family. And that love is there even when there is fear or confusion.

3. There’s very few resources.
Books have been written for parents of transgender youth, for teens on coming out as queer, and BDSM lifestyles such as ”When Someone You Love is Kinky“. When one of my partners and I were first exploring non-monogamy, we found “The Ethical Slut” and “Opening Up” full of helpful information. And while there are books about sex work and sex & culture, there’s not much specific to pornography. Of the sex educators and sexologists I’ve asked, it seems that this book has yet to be written.

For a brief history on the beginnings of the porn industry as we know it, check out Michael Stabile’s documentary “SMUT CAPITAL OF AMERICA“.  A strange fact is that the very people I’m coming out to have been alive longer than the industry itself. Porn — at least the kind that’s sold online and in stores for personal viewing — hasn’t been around for very long. Perhaps the fact that it’s still so new is one reason why there’s not a lot published on the subject.

Another reason of course, is the subject itself.

4. Porn is a four-letter word.
One of the reasons it took me so long to come out was my fear that I would be judged and I would lose my family’s love. No matter how brilliant and loving someone is, I still am afraid that coming out to them will cause them to think poorly of me, pulling from society’s stereotypes of sex workers being naive or damaged victims, powerless or coerced. There’s so much shame around sex in our culture, that even though it’s legal and very common, there’s stigma around P-O-R-N. (On a side note, many of the people I’ve worked with refuse to call their work “porn” because of these terrible associations. For myself though, I think that breaking down the stereotypes is part of the process. While much of the work I do can be described as erotic, sexual documentary and adult cinema, and my intentions can gravitate towards sex-positive representation and alternative views of healthy sexuality through working primarily with people whom I’ve loved… at the end of the day: I did porn.

5. The Internet is Forever.
Part of my organic, “self-agent process” entails my decisions to meet directors and co-stars before agreeing to on a project. And if that can’t happen for whatever reason, they must come with strong references or recommendation from people I know. When you perform in porn, you sign the rights of your image over to a producer. When a sexual image of you is published online, it’s there forever. It’s downloaded to user’s computers, it’s shared on Tumblr, and as much as you might try to control it… once it’s done, it’s done. This is the reason I try to work with directors and producers who I feel understand and respect me and my identity. The process of putting myself out there in ways I have some control over, establishing my identity and creating representations of people like me, outweigh the dangers of people behaving with malicious or exploitative intentions. It’s a known risk, and one I’m willing to take even though it can be frightening, especially for loved ones.  It can also mean that you can be outed through an image online at any given time… regardless if it’s flattering or not.

So where am I now?

Honestly, I think I’m still the same place I was before I first came out, only now I can share my excitement and pride in my accomplishments. How GOOD it feels to not have to tell white lies about my trips abroad, traveling half-way around the world to “visit friends”. I hate lying. I feel more shame in the fact that I lied to my family, than I ever will about the sex I had on film.

And coming out hasn’t changed my decisions about doing porn. (Although knowing that my family can read my blog means I’ll try to remember to proofread.) As always, I’ll continue to do projects which I think are satisfying to me while exploring the genre — in a way that is safe and sustainable, and teaches me and others about sex and pleasure. From the beginning, each project I do is a choice. Even though I can’t claim that they’ve all been brilliant, shining examples of my sex-positive philosophy, and that sometimes I work with a production that probably wasn’t the best fit, each project has been lesson in helping me define and articulate the power I have of my own sexuality and autonomy.

So, I feel proud about all this. And, I want to ask for your help.

I wrote this blog post in hopes that it will help me form my thoughts about coming out, and maybe it can offer something to you. But I need more resources. Do you know a good book or blog post I can use to create a “syllabus” of supporting materials to help other performers, families and friends find the information and validation they need to come out? (This information will help me and my own family too, that’s for certain!)

In addition to books and links, I’d like personal stories.

To be truthful, I’m not sure what I will do with these stories yet. That might be determined by how many of you share them with me. I might want to publish them in an eBook. Or simply share them on this blog. Or on Tumblr. As far as I know, this book has not been written, despite how helpful I think it might be. I know performers who have had beautiful coming out stories with their families, and some who have not. I know performers who are parents themselves, and so coming out involves age appropriate information for youth.  I also have youth in my life who I will someday decide to share some level of information about what I do. I’d rather they hear it from me than their friends. So, what was your experience like? Or what information do you withhold? If you or someone in your family hasn’t done porn, do you talk about watching it? Or do you protect your files? Are there other coming out stories you think are relevant? I want very much to hear about experiences other than my own, so I’m putting out a call for submissions.

Coming Out About Porn

Please send me your porn coming out story. You can write anonymously, you can share your book or other resources with me.

Submissions should be approximately 1000 words.

Email word documents to jiz@jizlee.com.

Feel free to submit work you’ve already published, or work you’re planning to publish.

I will reply to everyone by the end of March.  Feel free to repost.

Thank you everyone, for the support you’ve given to me through your emails and messages, for purchasing my work, for respecting my gender pronouns and sexuality, for inspiring me to write and share my experiences, and more. I’m looking forward to hearing from you!

Shine Louise Houston and I modeled the new RodeoH Harnesses, and Tristan Crane took cute pics.

Want to see the harness below the belt? Check them out at RodeoH.com.

Nominations I’m a part of include:

Best All-Girl Group Scene
Taxi 2, Juicy Pink Box/Girlfriends; Madison Young, Jiz Lee & Nic Switch

Best All-Girl Release
Cherry 2, Jewelbox/Digital Playground
Taxi 2, Juicy Pink Box/Girlfriends Films

Best Girl/Girl Sex Scene
Cherry 2, Jewelbox/Digital Playground; Jiz Lee & Andy San Dimas

Best Educational Release
Gush: The Official Guide to the G-Spot & Female Ejaculation, Good Releasing
Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Female Orgasms, Vivid Ed

Best Vignette Release
Rough Sex 3: Adrianna’s Dangerous Mind, Vivid Entertainment Group

Best Alternative Website
QueerPorn.TV, Trouble Films Network
JuicyPinkBox.com, Jincey Lumpkin

Specialty Release – Other Genre
Crash Pad Series Volume 6: Wide Open, Pink & White/Good Releasing

Best New Line
Jewelbox Films, Digital Playground
Juicy Pink Box, Girlfriends Films

Best New Series
Taxi, Girlfriends Films

By the way, you can buy these films and others directly from me — just email jiz@jizlee.com.

That’s a whole lotta porn!

Award shows in themselves are interesting to me because they offer a reflection of the industry. I remember learning that the Feminist Porn Awards chooses not to post categories, yet the films are given a title for their win. Such as “Movie of the Year” or “Most Tantalizing Trans Film”. The AVN Awards seem to build categories that relate to the way the movies are marketed, which makes sense and also shows trends and changes in the industry. For example, this year there is a “Best Celebrity Sex Tape” category, and several Porn Parody categories. Also, we see “Best Female Performer of the Year”, “Best Male Performer of the Year”, “Best Transsexual Performer of the Year”, and “Best MILF of the Year”. Huh.

Queer pornography tends to fall under the Specialty Release – Other Genre, which this year includes Crash Pad Series Volume 6: Wide Open and Carlos Batt’s Sola — which was an independent limited time release that my doll April Flores would mail wrapped in her colorful fishnet stockings.

My explorations into mainstream pornography have placed me in “Girl/Girl” categories, which as another performer explained is simply based on my female sex and “female/female” doesn’t have the same ring to it. I suppose she’s right, still, the categories will continue to fascinate me. I wonder if there will ever be a queer porn category, as many websites are doing to create a new space for porn that has a blend of sexual identities and gender expressions, or if queer content will continue to exist in “Other Genre” or “Alternative” sections, or, if that’s even a categorization that will also be problematic. (Who’s to say what’s queer?) So far the awards are boxed as Girl/Girl, B/B/G and G/G/B, various straight sex acts, transsexual (usually just Trans Women), and Other/Alternative. For cisgender gay men, there’s the GayVN Awards, which have been inclusive so much as to nominate films featuring transmen, such as Trannywood’s movies. So it’s a pleasant surprise to see Buck Angel’s SEXING THE TRANSMAN XXX nominated for not only “Best Transsexual Release” but also “Best Sex Education Release” for the AVN Awards.

Though it was shot about 2 and a half years ago, I’m really interested to see TAXI and Juicy Pink Box nominated now that they’ve partnered with Girlfriends Films to distribute DVDs from the web content. I had the pleasure of watching my scene with Dallas Fivestar while at the Berlin Porn Film Festival, and it really conveyed the chemistry between Dallas and I, who were lovers at the time it was shot. Juicy Pink Box and their DVDs through Girlfriends received a lot of nominations, including a Best Girl/Girl scene between Justine Joli and Syd Blakovich, and another nomination for Justine in the “Best Solo” category. I look forward to seeing what’s next for Juicy Pink Box, as they’ve cast another genderqueer performer, Papi Coxxx, in an upcoming production, as well as Drew DeVeaux, another popular queer porn star and outspoken, boundary breaking, transwoman. Will Drew be the next nominated New Starlet? I hope so.

It was a beautiful and somewhat surreal experience to work with Digital Playground and Jewelbox Films, because Digital is such a mainstream company. The production quality of their films is outstanding and the script for Cherry is dark and complex. I was thrilled to be cast as an androgynous DJ “Carson”, and felt so accepted on the set — shaved head and all! Cherry received a slew of nominations, from “Best Cinematography” and “Best Screenplay” to “Best Director” for Kay Brandt, and the star of the series, Judy Thompson, received a nomination for her Non-Sex Performance. Kay asked me who I’d like to work with, and I suggested Andy San Dimas, who I’d had a crush on, and still do. We had a quick and dirty scene that takes place in Cherry 2 — I loved that I could wear my realistic cock, and neither Andy nor myself took our tops off during the scene, something that you might expect from porn created with a straight male audience in mind. So it’s really cool to see our scene nominated!

One of the first mainstream companies I had the pleasure of working with was Vivid, with multi-talented director and self-identified 3rd genderation queer, Tristan Taormino. My first shoot with her was Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Female Orgasms. She welcomed me on set and everyone was super respectful of my gender pronouns. The film has a diverse cast and I appreciate that it is focused on education around the female anatomy and sexual pleasure — so it’s not specifically womens’ orgasms, but anyone with female sexual anatomy. Tristan’s other nominated film is Rough Sex 3: Adrianna’s Dangerous Mind which I was lucky to be a part of. Tristan is nominated for “Best Director”, and the film has a number of nominations including “Best Vignette Release” and I got to watch the filming of the Best Threeway scene with Adrianna, Keni Styles and Danny Wylde.

Other interesting things to me about the nominations are the slew of Crossover nominations, which includes Yasmin Lee who performed in Hangover 2. I haven’t seen the film yet, but I’m interested in it specifically to see her performance. You can read an interview with her about the role on translabyrinth.com.

Also of note are what looks to be growing similarities of nominated titles between this list and those of the Feminist Porn Awards, which make me think that the mainstream industry is shifting its marketing a bit, to create films like A Little Part of Me, and to submit it to places like the FPA’s, where it was awarded “Steamiest Romantic Movie” last April. For AVN, it’s nominated for “Best Feature” and “Best Screenplay”.

Just celebrating 1 year on the internet is QueerPorn.TV, which is nominated for “Best Alternative Website”. With CrashPadSeries.com being nominated last year, it’s great to see some familiar sites getting recognition. Congrats also goes to queer friends Bren Ryder (GoodDykePorn.com) and “Transsexual Performer of the Year” nominees Aly Sinclair and Juliette Stray. (One of Juliette’s first scenes was with CrashPadSeries.com.) And also to Bobbi Starr (BobbiStarr.com) and Nina Hartley (Nina.com) for their website nominations, Belladonna and Joanna Angel, Julie Simone, Kimberly Kane and Dana DeArmond for tons of nominations, and Lee Roy Myers who has a nomination for his Katy Perry Parody, for an outrageous scene between Kimberly and “Elmer”. It looks like a wacky flick. Here’s the Youtube Trailer. Tickle me, Elmo!

I hope everyone has a great time in Las Vegas. I’ll catch a wave for ya — A Hui Ho(s!)

UPDATE:  Cherry 2 (Jewelbox/Digital Playground) won “Best All-Girl Release” — congrats to Kay Brandt and everyone on the production!

The event is hosted by the sex toy store “Good For Her” in Toronto. Each year the screening and awards ceremony gets bigger and bigger, grabbing the attention of international media and raising important discussions about pornography. And bringing visibility to filmmakers working within new ways of producing and marketing pornographic movies and websites.

I’m very proud to be the 2010 recipient of the “Boundary Breaker” Award, and have also performed in films which have been awarded “Hottest Trans Sex Scene”, “Hottest Dyke Sex Scene”, “Most Diverse Cast”, and “Movie of the Year”. You can read about my experiences at the 2009, 2010, and 2011 ceremonies, or check out the posts tagged Feminist Porn Awards.

The official nomination period for consideration (they accept film AND websites) opens on December 1, 2011 and will close on February 17, 2012. In order to be considered for a Feminist Porn Award, submissions must meet at least 1 of the following criteria:

* The work depicts genuine pleasure, agency and desire.  These movies may also include a focus on connection, communication and collaboration between the performers and/or between the performers and filmmakers.

* The work expands the boundaries of sexual representation on film, challenges stereotypes and presents a vision that sets the content apart from most mainstream pornography.  This may include depicting a diversity of desires, types of people, bodies, sexual practices, and/or an anti-racist or anti-oppression framework throughout the production.

You can find submission, rules, and other information at Good For Her.

Thank you to the brilliant minds at Good For Her, to all the directors and people in front and behind the camera, and to bloggers, reviewers, fans, and supporters who are helping to fuel more diversity, consent, and expressions within these adult mediums.

You ready for a monster post? Well grab your lube, lay back, and relax. It’s late on Thursday night and I’m typing this out at one of my favorite bars, El Rio. San Francisco just felt it’s second earthquake today. It makes me shiver thinking about the fragility of our lives, the great divides between the earth and our existence. And then, you know, there’s fisting. Crossing my fingers the ground below my feet withhold a mighty quake, let’s get this blog going.

Not too long ago, I was chatting with my friend and fellow pornographer Courtney Trouble, about her recent film LiveSexShow, which is a fundraiser for the Center for Sex and Culture filmed during the non-profit’s annual Masturbate-a-Thon. I performed with Nina Hartley, for an audience of pleasure activists. And the chemistry was high with me and Nina, and we jumped into each other, and we had a grand time, and during that time, her fingers and then her whole hand went inside my cunt. And then I came for the crowd and for myself, and for my friend holding a video camera for the world to see.

At least, we hope the world could see.

For as long as I’ve done porn, distribution companies and retailers have banned the act of fisting in the films I’ve been in. It feels like it’s always been this way, but that’s not true. It’s only been a little over a decade.

Anti-porn movements, in particular the administrations which coincide with them, have had a bone to pick against pornography. For obvious reasons, I’m pro-porn, sex-positive, and a firm advocate of consensual, ethical, and artistic erotic imagery. For the circles I run in, the act of making porn is a brave, powerful, and righteous thing. We’re representing marginalized communities, taking power through creating our own images of desire. As my friend Shine Louise Houston infamously says, that as a queer woman of color, it’s especially important for her to create her own sexual images. And I completely and passionately, agree. Explicitly demonstrating our pleasure shows authenticity that rivals anything shown of queers in Hollywood films and brings examples of healthy sexuality that have long been denied in sex education classes. Safer sex? Check. Communication? Check. Equal gender agency, you bet. Lube? Right here.

Since 2005, I’ve been appearing in porn for DVD distribution that I knew would not include fisting, one of my favorite sex acts. Even my very first porn scene with my lover at the time, Syd Blakovich. It didn’t make sense that fisting couldn’t be shown, but I tossed it up to it being the fact that porn is marketed and driven by a lot of assumptions about what sells, what sex should look like, what the people who have sex should look like, yada, yada, yada. Basically all the reasons why I knew I was doing something important.

But wait, why is fisting so important? What do I like about it? Ask me? Okay, here’s some actual questions I’ve had, about fisting:

Why is fisting important to you?
My first experiences with hand sex, where my body took in the entire fist of a lover, happened around a time of galactic sexual exploration. I was in my early twenties and it was mind-blowing. The orgasms were intense and I was in an open relationship and was dating a lot of people so it was exciting for me to have sex with friends and teach them how to fist me, to fist others, and to really enjoy practicing sex in a safe way and to experience this with lovers of all kinds of genders and sexual orientations. It was so much fun. Fisting is about being really present and in your body, and ready for a good time.

Why do you love fisting?
What I love about fisting someone vaginally is feeling them take me in. There’s an moment where the person just opens up to you. Once inside, they’re so warm, wet, and every little movement you make can be felt. It’s something that may take time. Fisting is something that doesn’t necessarily happen right away. You put a finger in. Then two. Then three, four, and then… and sometimes after long gentle coaxing, the thumb. Sometimes lovers can try several times in sex before fisting happens. But once you’ve got it, it’s golden! You can angle your hand for G-Spot stimulation. You can find your lovers’ “A Spot”, which is just under the cervix and some like to feel a bit of pressure there. You can carefully stroke and “jerk-off” the cervix, as if it were a small, internal cock. Unlike using a strap-on or dildo toy, my hand can feel every motion. It’s incredibly intimate and really sexy. If the chemistry and connection with my partner is strong, can literally come from penetrating someone with my hand!

As someone who loves to receive a fist, what I enjoy about it is an unparalleled feeling of fullness. The most sensitive areas of the vagina are just within the first few inches inside the vagina, which is where I like to use my kegel and pelvic muscles to grip snugly around a lovers’ wrist, which can be compared to the girth of a medium-large dildo. Deeper inside, pressure feels good for me. I like to rock my hips against a lovers’ hand, or hold very still and squeeze hard, creating a game where I try to hold their hand tightly in place as they move against me. I do my kegel exercises and am pretty strong so I have a lot of control over my vaginal muscles and can make myself very tight, or, allow myself to stretch open. Or pulse between the two extremes. Combining clitoral and vaginal stimulation, the network of nerves and contracting of muscles orchestrate some of the most amazingly intense orgasms I’ve had.

What do you say to people who think it’s dangerous or scary?
Some people think fisting is intense in a bad way — that it hurts. But anyone who loves fisting knows that it can be the most intimate and beautifully connecting experience with a lover. Or a really fun in a three-some — I’ve held the hand, fingers locked, with a lover while the two of us have fisted a friend. I’ve also had both my fists inside two different lovers at the same time, while they kissed intensely. I’ve 69′ed with fisting, and I’ve even fisted myself!

Fisting isn’t any more scary than any kind of unwelcome sexual advance. However many people don’t know that much about it. We learn about sex as only being penis-vagina intercourse. But sex is so much more! We don’t learn much about sexual anatomy, how to communicate with lovers, or about pleasure. In fact, when we see a fist, we may be more inclined to think of it punching someone in the face because we see images of violence more common and at a younger age than we do sex. (ie: Cartoons show characters throwing punches and shooting guns, yet wont show even a bare breast.) In “This Film Will Not Be Rated”, we see the MPAA approve violent scenes with more leniency than they do sex scenes, especially ones featuring female pleasure. So when we as a culture are more familiar with a fist being used to harm someone, it’s no wonder that someone who hasn’t had a healthy sex-positive education about fisting would assume it is painful. In our culture we see fists as painful weapons, when I see them as revolutionary weapons of sex-positive progress. Or, you know, the ASL symbol for the letter “E”. See? That’s not so scary.

What’s your experience with fisting?
Personal love of the topic aside, my work in adult has primarily featured fisting. In fact, I fist in my films more often than I’ve worn a strap-on. This may come as a surprise to many DVD buyers, who would never see the act as it’s been edited or angled out of the scenes, with the exception of online website content for queer porn sites. And with the exception of Courtney Trouble’s new film “LiveSexShow” where I am fisting by Nina Hartley. I’ve also performed as a demo model for Fisting Demonstrations in adult classes such as Reid Mihalko’s Iron Slut: Sex Educator Showdown! and have taught it as a guest lecturer on sex ed at colleges and universities. I am also a contributor in “The Official Book of Sex, Drugs, and Rock n Roll Lists”, where I give my Top Five Songs about fisting.

So there you go. And while it’s not the first time I knew fisting couldn’t be shown in a hardcopy DVD, this year it was the first time I’ve heard of fisting being banned by a Video on Demand (VOD) company due to fisting. And here’s where some background comes into play. Because: WHY is it okay to show fisting ONLINE, but not in a hard copy DVD?

Well. Here’s what I know.

DVD distributors, retailers, and porn producers, are afraid to SELL porn if it means they might be charged with an obscenity. To date, some men are in jail or have had court orders for showing “obscene” content, such as John Stagliano and Seymore Butts. This content includes female ejaculation, enemas, and in 2001, fisting. The charges in the case of fisting were dropped with an plea bargain for a meager $1,000 fine. However this scared distributors because since that date, at least in terms of the companies who have distributed my films, fisting was NOT to be shown. If fisting was present, footage was edited out if it was visible, or left in if the camera angle was such that you couldn’t tell fisting was occurring. Why fisting?

Fisting is on the Cambria List of sex acts not allowed for inclusion in content meant for physical distribution.

From PBS:

On January 18th, 2001, Adult Video News reported on the so-called “Cambria List.”  Paul Cambria, a longtime attorney for the porn industry, was involved in the list’s preparation. The list is controversial within the industry and interpretations differ on how it was meant to be applied. Some in the industry say it represents guidelines for the box-covers of adult videos, not for the sex acts they depict. Nevertheless, there is wide agreement that the Cambria List shows how the adult industry is seeking to be more careful, fearing a potential crackdown on pornography by the Bush Administration.

The Cambria List:

Box-Cover Guidelines/Movie Production Guidelines

Before selecting a chrome please check facial expression. Do not use any shots that depict any unhappiness or pain.

Do not include any of the following:

• No shots with appearance of pain or degradation
• No facials (bodyshots are OK if shot is not nasty)
• No bukakke
• No spitting or saliva mouth to mouth
• No food used as sex object
• No peeing unless in a natural setting, e.g., field, roadside
• No coffins
• No blindfolds
• No wax dripping
• No two dicks in/near one mouth
• No shot of stretching pussy
• No fisting
• No squirting
• No bondage-type toys or gear unless very light
• No girls sharing same dildo (in mouth or pussy)
• Toys are OK if shot is not nasty
• No hands from 2 different people fingering same girl
• No male/male penetration
• No transsexuals
• No bi-sex
• No degrading dialogue, e.g., “Suck this cock, bitch” while slapping her face with a penis
• No menstruation topics
• No incest topics
• No forced sex, rape themes, etc.
• No black men-white women themes

Several things are not on this list and several things are on this list which should never have been. I mean, WTF?!

I emailed Queery Bradshaw, who has a legal background and she confirmed what I expected about the legal aspects behind several porn obscenity trials when they come to bringing visibility to marginalized sexual practices. Particularly in terms of freedom of expression. She wrote back:

It’s a double edged sword because the more a topic, scene or act becomes mainstream, the least likely it is going to be considered obscene against the community standard. But, if you’re constantly censored for fear of being prosecuted, you can’t make those acts known or common place. I know authors that have had fisting (or the mention of sex at all even) censored out of their beautiful non-erotic literary works of art. People are afraid and the only way to stop that fear is to talk about it, but you don’t know if you talk about it if you’re going to be prosecuted. And that is why I totally agree with you Jiz that this is completely and totally a free speech censorship issue and that we need to talk about how healthy it is so people stop seeing fisting as this thing that people do to degrade and dishonor another (which is justification often for censoring anything).

Despite this go-to list, there’s more info to know about pornography and obscenity, which is the Miller Test, which courts have gone to in efforts to determine what might be obscene when there’s no written rule. Here’s Constance Penley talking about obscenity and pornography. (Constance is a co-editor of the upcoming “Feminist Porn Anthology” which will be made available to the gender studies classes to colleges and universities world-wide.)

The Miller test was developed in the 1973 case Miller v. California. It has three parts:

• Whether “the average person, applying contemporary community standards”, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest,
• Whether the work depicts/describes, in a patently offensive way, sexual conduct specifically defined by applicable state law,
• Whether the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political or scientific value.

The work is considered obscene only if all three conditions are satisfied.

The first points are up to the standards of the community. What community? Whatever applies! That’s what makes it vague. The last one in particular is held up to whatever is reasonable to a person of the United States as a whole. The Miller Test is basically the reason why it’s okay to have more freedom of sexuality online, while less on physical DVDs. While there are many areas in the United States where it is illegal to mail pornography, it’s more difficult to determine online community. This is especially true for queers who at least in my case have found community online. To further prove my point, many queers think fisting is completely normal. (If not just normal, it’s amazing!)

If I had a dime for every time I’ve given a talk and had people give me a confused “WTF?” look when I brought up the fact that fisting was banned from DVDs “Why? What’s wrong with fisting?” I would have enough money to pay my way into congress and provide adequate (queer and kink friendly) education to every citizen in the US so that people will understand pleasure and sex-positivity.

So here we are.

I’ve fisted in much of my films and online content. In fact, I think I’ve fisted more times than I’ve squirted or even worn a strap-on. It’s that common. While I have been somewhat unfortunately hesitant to fist on film because I know about the ban, I also have the liberation with companies who have web content because I know they wont have to edit it out. I also know that film crews can film a “soft” shot of the action if they so please. It’s something I’ve dealt with for a while now, and because I know that the way we consume porn is changing and going more and more to the internet so eventually fisting will reign.

Imagine my surprise when I heard that Courtney’s film submitted for VOD was denied because of the scene. Not VOD! The internet is supposed to be okay with fisting, because it’s my community who likes to see it. That’s what prompted our Fisting Day. We have to let people know more about fisting. Why it’s supposedly banned, why it’s awesome if they’ve never thought about it before. Why it’s okay, even political, to love fisting.

If you want to watch me fisting, I recommend QueerPorn.TV scene with Papí Coxxx and most of my scenes on CrashPadSeries.com, including cool double fisting and simultaneous fisting scenes with Syd Blakovich & Micah Riot, and Dallas & Vai. And ANOTHER fisting scene with Nina.

Finally, as promised in my post announcing fisting day, here is a small gallery of fisting!

The introduction is for my longer blog post which I will publish October 21st.
The invitation is for you to join me and my friend Courtney Trouble in bringing awareness to one of the most amazing sexual acts I know and love: fisting.

Anyone who does it knows it can be one of the most intimate, consensual, and beautiful connections between lovers. Everyone can enjoy fisting. And for those of us in the queer community, fisting is a sex act that is actually quite popular. It’s for this reason that I say: Fisting censorship discriminates against queer sex. You may be surprised to know that fisting happens quite often in my films, you just can’t see it because it’s been angled or edited out. While many queer porn websites celebrate and show hand sex proudly, the act has been cut out of DVDs and left on the editing floor for over a decade. For as long as I’ve known, vaginal fisting has been censored by distributors, and while it’s still okay to show it online, where many people are increasingly watching their porn, some Video on Demand websites have started to ban fisting footage in an effort avoid possible obscenity charges. It’s just not right, and it’s downright homophobic. I hope that very soon we look back at this moment and think: “WTF?!”

How can you help?

October 21st is unofficially officially International Fisting Day!

Join me in being vocal about fisting! I include my love of fisting on all my bios and do it on camera whenever I can. Let’s celebrate and normalize the act! On Friday, October 21st, post a blog about fisting — what it means to you, what you like about it, tweet about #fisting, Facebook about the act. Share my post, share others’ posts. Tumblr the fuck out of it. Read a fisting how-to book. Watch queer porn online. (Check out my scenes on CrashPadSeries.com and QueerPorn.tv!) And if you want to be one of the first wave of supporters to order a DVD that actually has fisting IN it, October 21st is also the release date of Courtney Trouble’s LIVE SEX SHOW. So get excited. Learn something. Teach someone. Talk about it. Watch it. Love it. Join our FIST FIGHT!

At the very least, think of fisting in a sex-positive way. Even if it’s not your thing, know that for some people, it’s a sexual act that brings pleasure. Now who’d want to censor that?

Helpful Links:
Fisting Day Tumblr – Follow and Repost!
Facebook Fisting Day Event – Attend and Invite Others!
How to Fist – a Primer if you want to celebrate literally
Courtney Trouble’s Fisting Day Post
Twitter – Follow @JizLee & @CourtneyTrouble Hashtag is #fisting

P.S. You may have noticed I haven’t used any images of fisting in this post… sad thing, isn’t it, if there’s no fisting to be seen?! Well, make sure to check back on October 21st!

Fast-forward six years later and very few of us watch films on DVD anymore. We now can stream videos online and download them directly to our hard drives. File sharing is easier than ever and it only takes a minute to find a free version of virtually any movie you’re looking to watch. (And in many cases, a free film is more accessible if the payment method is one you don’t have access to, or you want to watch it immediately it’s only available to be shipped DVD.) At this moment, thousands upon thousands of torrent and tube sites provide access to free porn, capitalizing on visitor traffic, advertisements and making money off of content they didn’t produce.

Piracy has severely hurt adult businesses, only a few of whom can afford to fight back through lawsuits and propose new online sale tactics. Studios send “Cease and Desist” letters to each and every site discovered; it’s a time-consuming process that puts the companies at as much risk for virus attacks as it does consumers. Some companies have banded together, as the concern has many producers committed to finding a way to stop porn piracy by 2012. Others have made efforts to educate consumers, who may not realize they are doing anything illegal. Here’s a campaign created by the Free Speech Coalition, directed by Michael Whiteacre and produced by Joanne Cachapero. While it appears to be an upstream battle with more dislikes than likes and over 500 negative, insulting comments about the stars (who include my friends Sinnamon Love, Kimberly Kane and Joanna Angel), the video it is a valiant effort.

In addition to my day job, I also work behind the scenes with Shine Louise Houston and her website CrashPadSeries.com. I’m someone who personally values Shine’s work and is passionate about the success of progressive and especially queer and indie pornographers who I think bring sex-positivity, education, and visibility to our marginalized experiences. So it is difficult for me to see my own community furthering piracy of porn that was made for them. If you search “Crash Pad Series” in almost all cases, you’ll see a torrent site. If you search “Jiz Lee”, you’ll also see results to pirated porn (with insulting descriptions, no less). The people who click and watch these links are NOT supporting me. Furthermore, it makes me feel exploited, something I’ve yet to feel in any of the work I’ve done. As I’ve said online numerous times: the only time I’ve felt exploited in porn, is through piracy. Ironically, I think it’s something done by fans who don’t know any better.

I’ve seen fans publish tumblr posts with links to clips on pirated sites. I’ve contacted some, and they apologize and take it down, stating that they didn’t know. I believe them. It can be confusing with so much porn out there. Some people may not feel like sharing the content is doing harm. In fact some people may think they’re doing a favor! I’ve even seen a customer of queer porn post the login password to their subscription via their public twitter account. Whoops! That’s a big no-no and is specifically listed in the terms of service of all membership websites. One free porn clip I saw of a scene of mine had over 76,000 views. Imagine how much money the company could have made if all the people who watched for free had chosen to purchase the scene online or to buy that DVD directly from the company.

I would LOVE Shine Louise Houston to be able to make and cast me in another feature film (her last one, CHAMPION: Love Hurts, was phenomenal and won Feminist Porn’s “Movie of the Year” as well as an AVN Nomination for “Best Video Feature”!) I would love for her to be able to shoot for Crash Pad Series more than once a month — imagine how many queer performers, videographers, photographers, and video editors she could hire if she shot as much as once a week! Shine’s company, like many small producers have slowly grown over the last few years, working on sustainable business models within a niche genre of the industry. We’ve had to grow our own market of consumers, many of whom are turned onto porn for the first time when they see that there are performers they can relate to.

It’s understandable to not know that pirating porn is illegal. I hope this list of five ways the average consumer — and maybe some others involved in the industry — can work to educate one another and help our work blossom.

5 Ways YOU Can Fight Porn Piracy

1. Don’t repost or share links to free porn sites.
How do you know it’s pirated material? (Here’s a hint: if I’m in it, and you’re watching it for free, 99% of the time that means it was stolen!) And if it’s on a site called “FreePorn.com” or something like that, there’s a good chance it’s pirated. My friends and I are paid to perform, so it’s never just put online for free. Please value our work!

2. Educate others who link to free porn sites.
Be an advocate. A porn hero! If you see the link posted on Reddit, Tumblr, a blog, wherever… just send a simple message to the site owner or an @reply to your friend to let the person know what you think about porn piracy. Link to this post if you want. In most cases, they didn’t know better!

3. Keep User-generated Tube Sites User-based
Sometimes companies work with affiliates and post teaser clips to tube sites to attract potential customers. However a lot of pirated porn is uploaded to tube sites by people who are abusing the site’s Terms of Service. What to look for? If you recognize an adult performer or a company’s film but don’t see a company watermark, link or credit, it’s a good chance that user uploaded it illegally. Flag, Report, and Notify the tube site’s customer service to alert them.

4. Become an Affiliate
Send good links out to the web! You can support companies by sharing links to their sites through an affiliate programs. Join sex-positive companies like goodvibes.com (which produces a lot of the porn titles I’m in), hotmoviesforher.com, crashpadseries.com, queerporn.tv, enterbelladonna.com, joannaangel.com, buckangel.com, and many more. If you’re new to affiliate programs, scroll to the footer of websites and look for “affiliates”, “webmasters”, or “make money” and click to read more! Post on your websites about the porn you love and use these new links to send readers to purchases that will make everyone happy.

5. Buy porn!
The best way to support the porn you love is to purchase it. Many performers have personal websites where you can find links to their work. My site has a films page, websites page, and links page and a click from these pages will support my favorite companies. Buying porn from the performers and companies sites, and from those who sell their work, is the most direct way to support our growing industry. Put your money where your politics are!

Thank you for being a supporter, a fan, a friend, an ally and advocate. If you’re ever in doubt, ask me! You can comment here, or find my email address up in the sidebar. Together we can kick porn piracy out of our queer and sex-positive spaces.

For the last few months — and especially this weekend — I’ve been reading about changes happening in Los Angeles in the mainstream porn industry. I’d like to think there’s more difference between San Francisco’s little queer porn hub and LA’s porn valley, but like today’s weather, there’s a lot of grey.

Tomorrow, June 7th, at 10am, there is a Medical Meeting with the Cal-OSHA (California Division of Occupational Safety and Health) Board of Directors addressing Adult Industry Regulation. (Address: CalTrans Building, 100 S. Main St., Los Angeles, CA 90012). Porn performer Danny Wylde has been one of the most vocal industry bloggers about the recent news; his position as a performer and his writing skills as a blogger put him on the forefront as a key player within a pool of increasingly visible sexually progressive adult stars. Click on over to read his blog post “The Condom Debate“, because I think he most succinctly describes the issue at hand. Additionally, Violet Blue wrote a fantastic article “Real Sex and Porn Sex” not too long ago, which also serves as a must-read to more fully understand safer sex issues within porn.

Akira Raine and Chocolate Chip use a dental dam on queer porn site Crash Pad Series, nominated 2011 AVN Awards “Best Alternative Website” and recognized website at 2011 Feminist Porn Awards. Photo: CrashPadSeries.com

I decided to add my own story to the “debate”; because my experience is somewhat isolated as a queer porn performer. And this grants me interesting and conflicting thoughts around the issue. Just earlier, I was prompted to write and share my thoughts when I saw some posts on the subject by LA Girl-Girl porn performers:

“Think the condoms/porn debate doesn’t effect you? A girl-girl sex scene will require dental dams & gloves & there is no testing requirement.”

“So those condom regs, they are a lot worse than just condoms. Gloves, dams, face shields etc. This passes and porn’s done in CA.”

What’s wrong with barriers? I happen to be someone who adores gloves, and reading these made me feel shamed for enjoying safer sex in my personal life as well as on the screen, especially when the company is open to it. If you don’t like using dental dams or gloves, that’s okay but it’s good to note that the tests required for most mainstream porn studios, including Girl/Girl performers, are designed for heterosexual sex risks. In the queer porn that I’m familiar with, using barriers and opting not to have a straight porn test is a common choice among performers, who even bring their own dental dams to set along with their preferred lube.

One of the main differences I see between “mainstream” porn and San Francisco-based “queer” pornography* is the focus on sex-positive values which includes allowing diverse models to make the choice to best protect their sexual health. (*What is queer porn? It’s a term currently used to describe the work I perform in, where models span a range of queer sexual orientations and gender identities — queer women and men, trans and cisgender, and genderqueers for example — so it’s not simply defined as gay, lesbian, trans, or bisexual.)

How does giving models the choice best protect their sexual health? I believe a choice with a range of protections is better than one blanket-level standard (whether it’s barriers, or testing) for a number of reasons: mainly, it allows for flexibility depending on the models’ diverse needs. All our needs are different. Some models are real-life partners who are fluid-bonded and monogamous with their own testing precautions, or, poly/non-monogamous lovers who have specific arrangements. Some models are sex workers and have boundaries in porn that they may or may not have with their clients. For some models, it’s their first and only porn performance. For some models who work in LA or other industry porn, it’s a special shoot that allows them to have whatever kind of sex they want, or to perform with partners who are outside mainstream aesthetics. Models have different sexual histories, so choices in safer sex practices may vary based on our needs.

In addition, models have different sexual anatomy, regardless of gender expression, which may lend to different sexual risks. Different sex acts also pose varying sexual risks. So there’s a lot of variables and the awareness of all these different situations and kinds of risks, and using the information to apply to sexual practice is called “risk-based assessment.”

When I perform in porn, I make decisions within each scene based on risk-based assessment. For me, I am female-assigned at birth and my sexual health is put at various risks based on the anatomy of my co-star and what sexual acts we will do together. Here’s a chart I found which I modified to read as penis/vulva (as opposed to man/woman):

* You could be at risk if the receiver has just topped someone else.

** Very low risk.

*** Unprotected anal sex is a very high risk activity for a bottom, much more so than for a top. The risk of HIV transmission to a bottom during unprotected anal sex is 15 in 1,000 versus 3 in 10,000 from a bottom to a top.

• Kissing, mutual masturbation, and frottage or dry humping are considered safer sex activities, with little to no risk of STD transmission.
• Using latex condoms (male or female) significantly reduces the risk of contracting STDs during anal, vaginal and oral sex.
• Washing hands and the genital area thoroughly before and after oral-anal sex reduces the risk of transmission of most of the listed STDs and conditions. Condom use reduces transmission risk even further.

Source: SF City Clinic, via Pink & White Productions (who provides safer sex resources to models). There’s also this guide with risks and tips for Queer Trans Men.

New info sent to me by Metis Black of Tantus Inc: “HPV isn’t an unknown for oral sex- 35% of the throat cancer in men is from HPV and rising.” [source: Wall Street Journal "Throat Cancer Linked to Virus"]

In queer porn scenes, my costars who are lovers and friends, the sexual acts are up to us, including what safer sex practices we use to help protect ourselves and each other. This sometimes takes the form of testing, gloves, condoms on toys, whether or not to go down on each other, whether or not to have anal sex, and a multitude of other choices.

Nina Hartley and I use gloves, condom on a silicone dildo, and water-based lube in our scene for CrashPadSeries.com.

Up until about a month ago, industry professionals in Los Angeles, and sometimes in SF such as Kink.com models, did routine testing at AIM (Adult Industry Medical Heath). It is industry standard that an AIM Panel test with negative results be current within 30-days (two days for some companies).  Some people call this a “clean” vs a “dirty” test; I dislike those terms as it furthers cultural stigma around sexually transmitted diseases, the people who have them and even the industries they work in. So I often use the phrase “current”; which implies that my test results are satisfactory and it hasn’t expired. Currently, performers who went to AIM are now going to Talent Testing, which appears to offer an expanded test for a more affordable cost.

I don’t recall when I did my first test for porn, though it wasn’t for a few years after I had already been in the industry working in queer porn with friends and longterm fluid-bonded partners. When I did get tested specifically at AIM for porn, I found it interesting that the same test is required in LA for both Boy/Girl and Girl/Girl shoots. (Note that while I am female-bodied. I don’t identify as a girl, and many of my scenes — as well as those of many transmale friends  – are often categorized within mainstream as G/G.) As a performer working with a female-bodied costar, I paid out-of-pocket for the $130 test, which covered: HIV-1 DNA, Chlamydia & Gonorrhea by PCR. These are high risk for sex that is heterosexual, penis/vagina and penis/anus sex with the female performer receiving. I’ve had to have this test for a scene where I was performing strap-on sex, topping a female-assigned co-star. In this situation, my risk is very very low; I’m more at risk for HPV and herpes which are not required tests. However the standard was to have this test so I complied. Naturally, I’m happy to be tested regularly; it’s never a bad thing to have too many tests. I’m just using the example to point out how the testing standards are skewed towards heterosexual sex.

Personally, I love performing safer sex practices on screen because it makes me feel safer and comfortable. I also think it’s great to have examples of people using gloves and demonstrating other safer sex practices because it shares with our community to those who may be new to the idea of safer sex. While no substitute for good sex education, safer sex demonstrated in queer porn can provide examples of communication and safer sex practices. The sex education I received in school didn’t include homosexuality or bisexuality. At some point condoms were introduced as pregnancy prevention. It wasn’t until I was in college that I learned about STD risks, and I learned the hard way that suntan and massage lotions break condoms. There’s a lot about sex ed that we aren’t taught in schools. Or in our culture in general; to this day, I still meet people who think all lube will give them yeast infections (try a water-based non-glycerine or silicone lube). My point is that there’s a lot of sex information lacking in our education system, and it’s no surprise that many people turn to porn for sex education. Director Chi Chi LaRue spent a good 20 years in the gay porn business fighting for visibility of condoms and the safer sex consideration of porn performers. In the gay community, particularly effected by AIDS, showing safe sex as an example of how to have good sex is particularly important.

Ultimately what it boils down to for me is my belief that all performers should be able to have sex as they feel safest to. Whether that means testing, barriers, a combination, or whatever they’ve consented to. I don’t think safer sex barriers should be REQUIRED, nor do I agree that performers should feel pressured not to use them. Production companies can provide as much resources, safer sex supplies, or testing reimbursement as they can afford, and allow porn performers the freedom to choose what they feel most comfortable with. Top three examples of companies and directors I have worked with who provide additional safer sex supplies to help models feel safer are: Kink.com (on set with Princess Donna), Pink & White Productions (Directed by Shine Louise Houston), and Vivid-Ed (on numerous sets with Tristan Taormino, whose performer-conscious work was recently featured in CNN posted “Prevent STDs like a Porn Star“). Thanks in part to an increasing diversity of progressive pornography, our culture is becoming more and more educated and sex-positive. Let’s continue supporting each other in the adult industry, and also learning more — as I am — about how to be the safest we can be.

UPDATE:

I followed along via Twitter as Ela Darling, Michael Fattorosi, and others shared agenda topics and reactions of those present online. This morning I’m reading articles as they are published, which I’m including here.

If you’re curious, here is the draft created from the meeting.
Feedback on it can be sent to Deborah Gold at DGold@dir.ca.gov

I appreciated what looks like a really thorough AVN article by Mark Kernes (Industry Expresses Its Feelings—Loudly—at Cal/OSHA Meeting) and Danny Wylde’s Abbreviated Account of the June 7th Cal-OSHA Advisory Committee Meeting. Here’s his conclusion.

“There are many more points to cover. But this is an abbreviated version, so I’m going to end here:

As it stands, nothing has actually changed except for that fact that we are now very much aware that Cal-OSHA considers our industry practices to be illegal, and AHF is very insistent in making sure we are penalized until we change those practices.

The problem is that those practices are the basis for our livelihood and they have gone unchallenged for years.

Further, performers in attendance were in near unanimous agreement that our testing practices under AIM healthcare were sufficient and effective, and we do not want mandated barrier protection in our industry.”

Read his entire post on trvewestcoastfiction

My sense is that the experiences I’ve had with progressive producers who work within the industry’s current testing standards and who have been open and encouraging around performers’ individual sexual health needs is essentially what the rest of the adult industry wants. I’m curious to see how “adult entertainment” is defined in terms of creating definitions for pornography (which may relate to free speech concerns). It seems like the debate is primarily concerned with heterosexual/straight sex — particularly at one point when “they Gay Industry” was brought up, as if it were outside the conversation (perhaps because condoms are the standard in this genre). It will be interesting to see how regulations effect things, and it was exciting to see performers speak up about their rights; even from another city in San Francisco.

More articles:
Shaya Tayefe Mohajer, Associated Press – Porn Stars Oppose California Condom Plan
Lyla Katz, X-BIZ Porn Performers Unite Over Proposed Cal/OSHA Safety Regulations
Free Speech Coalition Blog – Study Finds LA County Health Dept Reports on Adult Industry STI Data Flawed, ‘Without Basis in Science’

UPDATE 1/18/2012
Well, it’s passed — so in about 90 days LA production companies (at least, those who get permits) will have to use condoms for heterosexual scenes. It doesn’t really effect me much at all, though it does the people I know who work down there in those types of scenes. Here are some other updates in the meantime:
Lorelei Lee wrote a great piece about this in Salon. http://www.salon.com/2012/01/18/l_a_s_porn_mistake/singleton/
I was interviewed for an article in CounterPunch’s “The Condom: Friend or Foe in the Adult Film Industry”.

Image: J-Bird. Click for larger view.

Nope, that didn’t work… *slaps self*… maybe better… maybe…

How excited am I!? First of all, Nina Hartley — who many people may know from the film “Boogie Nights” and others may know and love from her countless sex ed videos (and of whom, many supported as she recovers from surgery) — recently inquired about shooting with me for CrashPadSeries.com, one of my favorite sites of all time. For me, Nina represents the classic boundary pushing lesbian who broke the barriers in the early days of queer women in porn (ie: “San Francisco Lesbians” on VHS). Flash forward, and we have Shine Louise Houston working in digital glory on crashpadseries.com, a queer site that continues to push the envelope for representation of queers of diverse sexualities, genders, backgrounds, sizes, abilities… basically, the sex we’re really having. So there’s a lot of celebration with introducing Nina on the site.

UPDATE!
The shoot was more than I could have dreamed for. Cocksucking and gender play and D/s and ejaculation and dirty talk Oh My.

Here’s a sneak photo… and much much more where that came from. (Good SIR! Nina is strong!!)

“Even for Jiz, this ejaculation was epic. It was the superman of ejaculations. Nina punched their bits and wham, it was like a fountain at Versailles.”
- “Hail to the Porn Titans” Review by Ali Oh from madeofwords.com

To watch, JOIN! CrashPadSeries.com